Baby Maverick

This blog was created to keep family and friends updated on what's going on with the pregnancy, birth, and surgical plan for Maverick. We'll also be able to keep everyone updated during his surgery and recovery and hopefully be able to show you some cute pictures of him, Maddie, Carter and Chloe along the way.

This was the original intent; however, when we started this blog we had no idea the twists and turns our lives would take. Our sweet baby Maverick was born September 12, 2008 with Transposition of the Great Arteries, ASD, and VSD. We expected to have a baby boy to bring home three to four weeks after his surgery. He had numerous complications after his arterial switch and fought through many that would have taken the life from an adult. He passed away February 24, 2009 - without ever coming home.

This blog is now a place I share my feelings, work through the grief, remember Maverick, and try to make sense out of our life without him. I hope in doing so I am giving a name and a face to babies everywhere born with congenital heart defects.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Chloe and Addison and Sunday at church

We went to Sunday school and church today. It's the first time we've been back since Mav died. Things went pretty smoothly. I went into the sanctuary after the music at the beginning of the service - Greg saved me a seat. For some reason, a lot of songs make me cry, so I just decided to skip the singing. We sat at the back. I could see Pastor Todd fine, but all the people in front of us precluded my view of where Mav's coffin sat. I think that helped. I had to leave a little early when the singing began again, but all-in-all, it went well. It was nice to see all our friends who have been so supportive throughout Mav's life. I cannot even begin to tell you all what a wonderful church we belong to. If you're looking for one in Shawnee, consider Immanuel Baptist.

So, if you're wondering who this cutie is in the pics it's my niece, Addison. Heather and Justin (my sister and her husband) came to visit this afternoon with her. They asked us to be her godparents - what an honor. Chloe was being quite bossy to Maddie and me during her visit. She told Maddie to be careful while she was holding her and was coaching me on burping her. She's so sassy. Carter missed out. He went to a friend's house for the afternoon. I think he probably enjoys playing basketball and xbox more than holding a baby, though.

The kids have been asking to go to Mav's grave with me, so I was planning on taking them this evening. The girls and I went to pick up Carter around 7:00, but I ended up visiting there until after dark. I think we'll go to his grave on Tuesday. It will be one month since his death - it's so hard to believe. I'm planning on doing something productive that day. I'm going to get my paperwork in order for admission to graduate school. I'm applying for a pediatric nurse practitioner program. If all goes well, I'll be able to start in the fall. Hope you all have a great week. Love you all - jc

7 comments:

SarahO said...

I am so glad you made it to church and it was great seeing you Friday night. As always, thinking of your family daily and wonderin g hoe you do it. God has given you some kind of strength. I am proiud of you.

Sarah

Lori said...

I just read your post. I found it on the Feedjit site for this Oklahoma area (I'm by Altus).
I am truly sorry for your loss of of your son. I lost a little boy (Caleb Trent)at 20 1/2 weeks in 2001 and we also had three children at that time. Delivering a baby who had died was something I had heard about and thought I could never be able to do. God gives us the strength we need to face the things in life that come our way. I'm praying for you and your family today. God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

Anonymous said...

Aw both of these pics are just precious. We went to church for the fisrt time in a while as well. It was definetely a much needed visit for us. We love you all.
Love,
Steph and Jay

Anonymous said...

Loved reading your post today. I was gone on Sunday, but am so glad you found being with church family to be a good thing. They are a gift.

Just wanted you to know that we are continuing to pray for you guys. Your journey thus far has been such an amazing, honest testimony of our humanity and God's grace.
Love you,
Amber

Vic Vines said...

Julie, Greg and gang...
I've been quietly watching and following you from behind as you've wandered this path. My heart aches for you all, and I am sorry Mav didn't experience the full life we all wished for him but the struggles he endured and the toughness he displayed gives us all some perspective on what it means to live fully. Perhaps we do appreciate one another more when we experience the loss of someone dear to us; it does seem that we probably learn to express ourselves more honestly after a loss like this.

So when I read that it's the music in church that makes you cry, I guess it's time to tell you a story, and it has everything to do with music and being surrounded by the woven net of souls that holds us up. While driving to work the day that Maverick died, but two days before I learned of his death, the sun was barely up across White Rock Lake and the song "Rainbow Connection" came up on a CD. Without knowing why I found myself in tears, and thought "What is that all about???"

I laughed at myself for being 50 and sentimental, or for being sleep deprived, or all of the above, and left it at that. But now I think I know...it's looking at life through the filter of a sheer net that drapes us and surrounds us. A net composed of a continuous thread of souls. Our children like Maverick Clark and Emily Vines, our parents, our siblings, our friends, and for some of us, those children we deliver and then have to let go. I have no doubt that Maverick would have been musical; no, he is musical. I knew it that day and you know it when you hear the hymns. Follow the music Julie--in the melodies and harmonies you are with him and he is in you.

Vic

Watts Family said...

I'm glad you are blessed with such a loving Church Family. Good luck with graduate school...you can do it!!

Amanda

Shannon "Coupon Princess" said...

I found this blog on Feedjit too, I am in Edmond!